Saturday 17 September 2022

Homesea Guard

It is important in a time of crisis to restore order and maintain law. I therefore organised a meeting at the Church Hall in order to form the Homesea Guard. This will mostly consist of the village sea cadets, and any other willing volunteers. This group of stalwart men and animals are essential for my plans to rescue and repatriate Homesea. Captain Walrus will be my second-in-command, so I have taken the rank of Admiral. After individually interviewing the volunteers, to make sure they were suitable for the job, I decided that we should adjourn to the Churchyard to practice our knots and splices. Unfortunately, the Badfort Crowd were all sitting on the low wall, surrounding the yard, and insisted on interrupting proceedings with their continuous jibes. "Look - it's Admiral Uncle and his balmy army!" shouted Beaver. I thought it best to try and ignore him and decided to end the evening with a rousing speech. "Right men - and boys - It's up to us now! We shall steer this ship..." "Hey Unc, you might not have noticed but there's no rudder on this village!"guffawed Beaver. "as I was saying before being rudely interrupted," I continued "we will in due course need to steer this 'village' and we will need a foc'c'sle party in case we need to come to anchor..." "You'll need a blooming big anchor, mate!" screeched Beaver. I could take these taunts no longer. "Listen to me Mister Hateman - you are not privy to my plans, but let me assure you that when I reveal them you will eat your words - Homesea will be saved!" I shouted. "Oh yeah! - and wants it gonna cost the rent and tax payers of Homesea? hey?" screamed Beaver "Just so you can get your village back!" I can see that Beaver and his gang are out to spread disaffection.

1 comment:

  1. It may be worth bearing in mind, sir, that they do not like it up them.

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